I walked up to the church door.
God I loved the smell of freshly fallen snow.
It was grey out, cold, I got to the main door and I stopped.
I remembered I was so lonely. Something hit me.
I was overcome with bitterness.
How dare he.
I waited in the closet.
It was so dark.
I was afraid to turn on the light.
I heard footsteps.
Julie was such a sweet woman... How could I have done this to her.
I froze as the door opened, afraid to move, afraid to breathe.
"Hi sweetie," she said cheerfully, "did you have a productive day while I was at work?"
She walked over to him and kissed his cheek - he still smelled like me.
"Ya baby, i missed you."
She turned and started to leave.
I couldnt help it.
I met her at the beach.
I used to go down there all the time at night. To get away.
I loved my wife but lately I couldnt stand being around her.
She was laughing - skipping the the water - playing with her dog who was playfully chasing her.
She looked like a goddess.
Her dog came up to me that night. We spent the whole night talking.
I hid my ring in my pocket that first night.
I ended up telling her I was married a few months later.
We kept seeing each other. I knew it was wrong.
I didn't care.
I don't believe in hell.
We met at church 8 years ago.
I always went to church.
I sat in the front row, he was in the choir.
We used to make eye contact the whole service.
He had such a beautiful voice. Like an angel.
The choir sang at our wedding. The ceremony was wonderful.
I was so happy. He used to sing for me.
He stopped singing lately.
God won't forgive me.
Not after what I've done.
She found me, and ended up leaving him.
That made me happy.
We've been together for a year now.
He stopped going to church when we met.
He says he doesn't believe. I'm ok with that.
As happy as I am, I have sinned so great.
I will never forget Julie.
She was such a sweet woman.
I'm so Lonely.
I never felt this.
As I stood on the cobblestone pathway leading to the church's door, sunday visitors walked by me, nudged me with their shoulders as they walked past.
I have gone to this church all my life.
27 years I have walked up these steps into the door.
I was always happy.
It was cold for December.
I turned around and walked back down the cobblestone path, away from the church.
I walked past the side walk.
A family was on their way to church, dressed in their Sunday best. Singing and laughing.
I walked off the curb.
The father took his eyes off the road for a split second to smile at his wife, who looked lovely.
She screamed a second later.
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