1) No photo
2) If a photo, bad, unflattering photo (wtf?)
3) Constantly mentioning they never use online sites because they’re all stupid and people who use them are desperate
4) Constantly bringing up they don’t know what to write to strangers
5) In their introduction message they’re creepy: “I have never been with a woman before”
6) Writing too much about how they are single and no one wants to give them a chance
7) Making my profile unknowingly fit into a niche market IE: Nerds
8) Pointing out the basics of my profile “so you’re blonde?”
9) Asking me general boring questions to garner a response. “You work for a video game company, do you like video games?”
10) The whole message says “hey”
11) Do not call a woman “sexy” as a pronoun like it is her name, in a first message or ever
12) The subject line of your message says “message me”
13) If it looks like you’re wearing more bronzer than the cast of Jersey Shore, or goth makeup that looks like Gene from Kiss
14) If your pictures are posed flexing muscles or making a douche bag face
15) Showing off your terrible and ugly tattoos like it will impress someone
16) Asking a personal or creepy question right off the bat like “did you wear braces” or “is your second toe longer than your big toe”, “I'm looking for my soul mate”
17) Your message consists of one short sentence that is either wrongly construed or offensive: “you look funny” “you would be fun to mount”
18) You message me and I ignore you, but you keep messaging me the same line over on different days like you are mass messaging women: “hey cutie how was your weekend”
19) Sent a message arguing over my profile: “why do you put so much importance on post secondary education, all it makes is loans and debt!” or “I probably make more money than you and I'm a high school drop out! LOL”
20) Blatant spelling mistakes a child would make: “chaseing”
21) Using ‘u’ and ‘r’ as words in a message, or profanity: “Gawd Dam chica u r so fine”
22) Lame pick up lines: “whats cooking good looking” and not even spelling what’s properly
23) Douchebag screen names: “Sexgod” “ilove3ways” “playa69”
My giblet head of a son Bobby once tried these "on-line dating sites." Well gosh darnit I grounded that boy for a week and told him I was using his allowance to buy a 12pack of Alamo.
ReplyDeleteI laughed. SO hard!
ReplyDeletehilarious lol XD
ReplyDeleteI find that girls on online dating websites are far too serious from their first email.
ReplyDelete"I'm looking for a man with whom I can share the rest of my life with and be happy and fluffy and eat chocolate everyday with puppies running around and the sound of babies ringing round my head!!"
DO YOU WISH TO SEND A REPLY? O.o
you said that you'll give relationship advice? Excellent! I need your opinion on this situation:
ReplyDeleteI met a girl who has been hot and cold ever since we met. She is here for 6 months and apparently has a boyfriend back home. We usually bump into each other when out and there is a lot of chemistry - we flirt, we share drinks, she seeks protection from me when guys hit on her and tells people I'm her boyfriend, we dance close, we kiss, and on one occasion so far, we have *slept* in the same bed. But then when I suggest that she comes out to do things other than going out partying, she is like 'maybe it isn't a good idea' and 'I shouldn't want anything from you, but I can't help myself. Maybe I should stop drinking.'
But then, she'll text me asking if I'm out, if I tell her I'm not, she says 'I'm at a party and going to a club later. Pity :('
I'm not looking for anything serious.. A casual thing would be fine, then she can go back to hey boyfriend if she wants :P
What do you think?
lmao thats great. Whats wrong with is your second toe longer than your big toe”? Thats hilarious.
ReplyDeleteFYI, since changing my profile pic on a dating site to a pic of me flexing with my shirt off, my views shot up 2000%. I agree, we all look like douche bags, but I'd be wrong if I said it didn't work.
ReplyDeleteThese online dating sites like Plentyoffish.com, Match.com, and others have a mixture of fake and real profiles in them. You have to search carefully to find the true ones.
ReplyDelete